Lately...
Lately has been hard.
I'm in college. We just had mid-terms, and it was good to have a mile marker so to speak. There has been some hard stuff at home and it's hard to realize that you really could lose someone at any time. But that also makes me remember that I need to rely on God and keep others in His hands.
Also today I went to Timber Bay to hang out with the girls at our outreach. We watched a movie called "Amish Grace" It's based on a true story of when there was a shooting at a small Amish school. It was so sad. Those little girls got killed and the Amish people chose to forgive. It was really convicting because I get mad at God when things go wrong in my life and it's just little things. I just want to get over that. I need to take time for myself and hang out with others so I don't focus on myself. I just want to be grateful and focus on all the blessings God has given me. I don't want to screw up my life by making bad choices when good choices are just as easily accessible. God loves me! That is such a big deal and I don't have to let my mistakes define me. I need to be assertive and decide that I'm not going to take it anymore and really have standards for myself. I don't need to be down on myself, but I should encourage myself in the word, I am more than a conqueror in Christ!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=St5tz4Pxdhs By your side by tenth ave. North
This song is in my head. I know this is God's word for me. Oh, he is so good!
I just want to be grateful for what I do have! God gives and takes away. He has every right to. It's his world, he makes the rules. We ought to be grateful for this. I think if we made all the rules things would get pretty messed up. God knows the depths of the human heart and therefore he can judge between us, not us, we are more like icebergs to each other. That's how I feel about it.
I guess you realize what's really important to you when you lose things & your world is shook up.
I'm really grateful for my women friends here and elsewhere-- my mom and aunts, cousins, my RA Katie, my CA Sarah, my best friend sister twin Destiny Rose, my sister Brittany, etc. They always help keep me on track. I know it really helps me to talk to people and to just get a good hug and be with people who are okay with me crying. I'm realizing how severely broken the world is, that it's not my fault and I just need to do my best and rely on God. That doesn't mean being perfect, but giving it all to God. I want to be able to be honest with people --I'd rather watch Bug's Life than Saw movies, and I don't want people to be hypocritical. I hate it when there's recycling right by the trash and they still throw it in the trash. I take it out of the trash and put it in the recycling.
Sometimes I think if I just get my act together everything will be alright. Really I need to give it to God and take it slow and breathe. I'm never going to figure it all out or have my act together. I'm just not. Ok? :)
Here's something I wrote today:
Deep down, I want God more than anything. I want God more than life, friends, kids, a guy, anything. I want God. I want Beauty. I don't care about the pain. I want life to be beautiful no matter how much I have to sacrifice, forgive and forget, give, give up, or how open and vulnerable I have to be. This is my deepest desire. God loves me. I want that to change everything inside me into hope and glory! I want to do everything with the thought of pleasing God in mind. I want him to always be first. He saved my soul for eternity and he bought me with his blood. Anything I do, it has to be by his bidding. He rescued my soul and now no one can win me by nice words or deeds. I can't let myself become my own God.
LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=Bv1vgPrdQq4
life is beautiful song by the afters.
Dear God, I want to learn to appreciate you and to really drink in life! Please take care of my family no matter where you lead us. I know you hold us in your hands and you want what's best for us. Thank you that you care God and life really is beautiful.
Salud! Dios te bendiga!
I'm in college. We just had mid-terms, and it was good to have a mile marker so to speak. There has been some hard stuff at home and it's hard to realize that you really could lose someone at any time. But that also makes me remember that I need to rely on God and keep others in His hands.
Also today I went to Timber Bay to hang out with the girls at our outreach. We watched a movie called "Amish Grace" It's based on a true story of when there was a shooting at a small Amish school. It was so sad. Those little girls got killed and the Amish people chose to forgive. It was really convicting because I get mad at God when things go wrong in my life and it's just little things. I just want to get over that. I need to take time for myself and hang out with others so I don't focus on myself. I just want to be grateful and focus on all the blessings God has given me. I don't want to screw up my life by making bad choices when good choices are just as easily accessible. God loves me! That is such a big deal and I don't have to let my mistakes define me. I need to be assertive and decide that I'm not going to take it anymore and really have standards for myself. I don't need to be down on myself, but I should encourage myself in the word, I am more than a conqueror in Christ!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=St5tz4Pxdhs By your side by tenth ave. North
This song is in my head. I know this is God's word for me. Oh, he is so good!
I just want to be grateful for what I do have! God gives and takes away. He has every right to. It's his world, he makes the rules. We ought to be grateful for this. I think if we made all the rules things would get pretty messed up. God knows the depths of the human heart and therefore he can judge between us, not us, we are more like icebergs to each other. That's how I feel about it.
I guess you realize what's really important to you when you lose things & your world is shook up.
I'm really grateful for my women friends here and elsewhere-- my mom and aunts, cousins, my RA Katie, my CA Sarah, my best friend sister twin Destiny Rose, my sister Brittany, etc. They always help keep me on track. I know it really helps me to talk to people and to just get a good hug and be with people who are okay with me crying. I'm realizing how severely broken the world is, that it's not my fault and I just need to do my best and rely on God. That doesn't mean being perfect, but giving it all to God. I want to be able to be honest with people --I'd rather watch Bug's Life than Saw movies, and I don't want people to be hypocritical. I hate it when there's recycling right by the trash and they still throw it in the trash. I take it out of the trash and put it in the recycling.
Sometimes I think if I just get my act together everything will be alright. Really I need to give it to God and take it slow and breathe. I'm never going to figure it all out or have my act together. I'm just not. Ok? :)
Here's something I wrote today:
Deep down, I want God more than anything. I want God more than life, friends, kids, a guy, anything. I want God. I want Beauty. I don't care about the pain. I want life to be beautiful no matter how much I have to sacrifice, forgive and forget, give, give up, or how open and vulnerable I have to be. This is my deepest desire. God loves me. I want that to change everything inside me into hope and glory! I want to do everything with the thought of pleasing God in mind. I want him to always be first. He saved my soul for eternity and he bought me with his blood. Anything I do, it has to be by his bidding. He rescued my soul and now no one can win me by nice words or deeds. I can't let myself become my own God.
LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=Bv1vgPrdQq4
life is beautiful song by the afters.
Dear God, I want to learn to appreciate you and to really drink in life! Please take care of my family no matter where you lead us. I know you hold us in your hands and you want what's best for us. Thank you that you care God and life really is beautiful.
Salud! Dios te bendiga!
Comments